Honoring My Ancestors: A Journey Through Spirit, Lineage, and the Eternal

During this fall season, I've been reflecting deeply on my ancestry and the unbroken connection I feel with the spirits of my family. This connection, which has always simmered beneath the surface, has grown profoundly since we moved to the Blue Ridge Mountains in May. This place, with its ancient, undulating peaks, feels like a catalyst for ancestral growth, as if the land itself is helping me reconnect to my roots.

Ireland: A Sacred Handfasting and Lingering Questions

Ireland has always been central to my connection to family and spirit. My relationship with this sacred land began when I studied abroad there in 2013, but it truly deepened over years of returning, each visit revealing more layers of meaning. In 2020, my husband and I held a handfasting ceremony in Killarney when no tourists were there due to the pandemic. Experiencing Ireland in its most natural state, untouched and quiet, was profound. It felt as though we were witnessing the land as it once was—a place where spirit flows freely and ancestors whisper in the winds.

This February, I spent a month in Ireland for work, researching in Irish homes by day and tracing my ancestral journey by night. My mother's lineage was straightforward—our family traces back to Cormac McCarthy of Blarney, in Ulster. But my father's side was shrouded in mystery. Despite my efforts, the trail in Ireland grew cold.

There's a lingering grief I feel over not knowing where his lineage truly began. As my awareness deepened this fall, I began to sense that perhaps we've been looking in the wrong place. While I had focused on Ireland, the pull of Scotland—its music, its traditions, its land—has grown undeniable.

Scotland: A Call to the Ancestors

The connection to Scotland has taken root in my heart. The more I explore its traditions, the more I feel the resonance of my father's lineage. Ancient Celtic music sends chills through my body, as though it's awakening something dormant in my spirit. When I learned that the Appalachian Mountains, where I live now, were once connected to Scotland before the tectonic shifts of Pangea, the feeling clicked. My love for the Blue Ridge Mountains is not just a modern attachment—it's ancestral. These ridges, both here and in Scotland, hold echoes of my family's past.

This pull deepened when I participated in a firewalking ceremony on Samhain. Firewalking, a Celtic practice with deep roots in ritual and transformation, spoke so profoundly to my soul that I knew I had to learn to facilitate it. While I'm learning this practice in Scotland next May at Tir na nOg, it feels like a piece of my heritage coming full circle. It feels as though Scotland holds the key to unlocking the truth of my father's lineage—a truth waiting to be discovered.

Samhain: A Profound Connection to Spirit

It was during this season of Samhain, the Celtic festival marking the thinning of the veil between worlds, that I experienced an extraordinary connection to my ancestors. In a somatic healing session, the healer placed an onyx stone on my head. It was the same type of stone as the ring my late grandfather wore on his pinky—a ring I now wear on my right hand every day.

The moment the stone touched my skin, I felt his presence. My grandfather's spirit enveloped me, and I felt his arm resting on mine, as though he were reassuring me that he was there. As I spoke of him, the connection deepened. I then began to speak of my grandmother, who had passed, and the guilt I carried for not attending her funeral. In that moment, I felt her forgiveness—not something I needed to earn, but something she had always given freely.

The weight of my ancestors grew palpable. I thought of my other grandfather, and then of the countless spirits who came before me. Their presence was so strong, it felt as though they were physically holding me. I couldn't move my arms, but I didn't want to. I was being embraced by my lineage—a reminder that I am never truly alone. This experience reaffirmed what I now know in my heart: that after death, we become light, free from earthly burdens. And in that state, we continue to guide and love those who remain.

The Tattoo: A Tribute to My Lineage

This profound awareness of my ancestry and spirit has inspired a tattoo that will commemorate both my lineage and the eternal connection I share with my ancestors. The design is rooted in deep symbolism and personal meaning, and while it's still in concept (and has been for over 8 years!) and may continue to evolve as we build it out over the next week, its core elements hold significant meaning for me.

At its center is the stag from my mother's family crest. The stag represents strength, leadership, and wisdom—qualities my mother's lineage has embodied for generations. Its antlers, carved with Celtic knots, symbolize the eternal, unbroken bond between myself and my ancestors. These knots reflect the interconnectedness of life, death, and rebirth, weaving together the known and unknown stories of my heritage.

The bones of the stag's skull carry their own significance. They symbolize the enduring nature of spirit, even as flesh fades away. The antlers, acting as a bridge between earth and sky, speak to the connection between the physical and spiritual worlds.

Surrounding the stag are red roses from my father's family crest. The roses represent love, beauty, and the deep connection I have with his lineage. I'm considering whether to incorporate thorny vines that might crawl out of one of the eyes—a concept that symbolizes the complex beauty and pain of lineage. This element is still to be determined as the design evolves.

The tattoo sits on my hip, a placement chosen for its symbolism. My hip is a source of strength and support, much like my ancestors. With this tattoo, I carry their wisdom, their struggles, and their guidance with me, both literally and metaphorically.

Carrying Forward Ancient Traditions

This tattoo also serves as a reminder of my responsibility to carry forward the traditions of my ancestors. Whether it's through firewalking, honoring the cycles of Samhain, or reconnecting others with ancient practices, I feel called to ensure these traditions are not lost. The land, the rituals, the music—they all hold echoes of those who came before us.

The experience of living in the Blue Ridge Mountains, tracing my roots, and opening my awareness to spirit has shown me that we are never disconnected from our past. My hope is that this tattoo will serve as a visual reminder of that truth: that we are part of something greater, something eternal.